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Couples Communication: Listening Without Reacting

Couples Communication: Listening Without Reacting

We often associate communication with what is being said and not with what is being heard.  Research shows (Adler, R. et. al., 2001) that we spend approximately 30% more time listening than talking in communication, yet listening is far less understood.  It doesn’t matter how good a communicator you are if nobody hears what you’re saying.  One of the main differences between talking and listening is that you cannot prepare to listen.  Continue Reading

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4 Ways For You To Think Like A Therapist

4 Ways For You To Think Like A Therapist

It’s not that difficult to think like a therapist.  A lot of it is just common sense.  It’s not about knowing who is right or wrong, it’s about applying critical thinking to situations, having a good understanding of contextual information, knowing the role of empathy, staying current and relatable and being naturally curious.  The art of doing psychotherapy, on the other hand, requires a lot of skill but thinking like a therapist can make a big difference right now in how you manage your problems. Continue Reading

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The Emotional Marriage

A marriage is an emotional journey; a mix of passion and pathos, attraction and repulsion, and dreams and defeats.  Sometimes marriages survive, and sometimes they don’t (See blog entry, Why Marriages Fail; https://www.larrylaveman.com/2014/03/marriages-fail/).  Regardless, there is always more to learn from a marriage than any other relationship in our adult life.  We are fused to our mate in marriage.  We are forced into honesty by the mere fact that we cannot escape.  We are revealed, exposed, challenged, loved and rejected.  Continue Reading

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Everyday Mysticism: Part II

Everyday Mysticism: Part II

From Unity to Duality: The Mystical Advantage of Polarities

In Part One of Everyday Mysticism we talked about Unity as representative of the Whole.  However, in order for the Whole to perceive itself it must become the focus of its own inquiry.  In doing so it becomes both a subject and an object, or a polarity. The focus of Part II is on the mystical advantage of polarities. Continue Reading

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Why Marriages Fail

Why Marriages Fail

Jim and Jenny have been married for seven years.  Their marriage is failing.  The spark that was there at the beginning no longer exists.  They no longer take the time to talk to each other with curiosity and interest.  They no longer hunger for each other sexually.  Jim has become preoccupied with his career and Jenny feels she’s stuck at home with two kids.  I could go on, but you get the picture.  So, wouldn’t you be interested to know that their marriage isn’t failing at all.  It’s just changing and maturing in ways they did not anticipate.  Continue Reading

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Everyday Mysticism: Part I

Everyday Mysticism: Part I

Exploring the Mystical Advantage of Unity

Mysticism isn’t as farfetched as you think.  Although it often seems shrouded in ancient rituals that are reserved for the initiated, symbols of mysticism surround every one of us, every day.  We often think of mystical experiences as being otherworldly and not related to everyday life, when in fact, they actually define our daily lives. Continue Reading

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Everyday Mysticism: Part III

Everyday Mysticism: Part III

From Duality to Creativity: The Mystical Advantage of Creativity

This is the third and final part in the Everyday Mysticism series.  In Part One of Everyday Mysticism, we discussed Unity as a representation of the Whole.  Part Two then explored how unity gives way to polarities, creating a unique transference of energy between polar extremes.  And finally, in Part Three, we will explore the mystical advantage of Creativity. Continue Reading

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Five Ways To Promote Marital Health and Harmony

Five Ways To Promote Marital Health and Harmony

Every marriage completes something in us and omits something we need.  The sense of completion is what draws us to each other while the familiar void of the omission is what we fuss about.  For instance, if we come from a large loving family we may feel a sense of completion when we marry someone who is kind and wants a family too.  Yet, if we were personally overlooked because individual needs were sacrificed for the sake of the larger group, we may feel the familiar edginess of not being taken into consideration when our spouse suddenly announces “we’re going to Spain on our next vacation”.  Continue Reading

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5 Reasons Why the George Zimmerman Trial is Important to You!

5 Reasons Why the George Zimmerman Trial is Important to You!

In 1964, Canadian scholar Marshall McLuhan proclaimed, “the medium is the message.”  He was not referring to the enormous influence “the medium” exerts on society, but rather the “unintended consequences” that innovation brings to society.  Over time, the unintended effects of the medium can become so great it determines how people perceive events to a much larger degree than the content warrants.  The medium can be anything that takes innovation to the next level including, in this case, the media.  Continue Reading

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Marketing the Disease, Selling the Medication

Marketing the Disease, Selling the Medication

The big business of drug revenue is constantly being fed by new and inventive ways of creating markets for drugs to affect.  This inventive marketing strategy was developed by SmithKline (today known as GlaxoSmithKline), a British pharmaceutical company, to market their depression drug Paxil in 1991.  It has since been adopted by many other pharmaceutical companies, including Pfizer in marketing Viagra, and Merck in marketing Zostavax, their drug for Shingles.  It’s a very effective strategy, contributing to over 4 billion total prescriptions being written in 2012 and drug spending topping $320 billion. Continue Reading

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